The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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