how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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