I could make wine with my vomit
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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