but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
