Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
