One girl and one boy is just not enough.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Randomize
