I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
