know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
