Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I wish you could order shots online.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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