just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Boobs are out for the taking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize