This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I love how my cats smell like pot.
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My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
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Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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