What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
