Grow some girl-balls and come out already
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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