This girl is more easily done than said...
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
