I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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