Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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