he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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