i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
