dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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