just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
