Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
