I just pynch a tree in the face
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
