I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Randomize
