i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
