I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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