And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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