That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
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