By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
i think my mom watched the whole time
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
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