Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize