Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
