Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
