Do you still have your period?
barbara walters just said penis...
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
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