are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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