she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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