i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Randomize
