there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Just high enough for therapy.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
