ADVERTISEMENT

• (618): View more from Illinois

  how was the sex?

  (1-618): View more from Illinois

  he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.

  (618): View more from Illinois

  well, there's that.

  Fav 22 1011 3965

  share tweet
  

• (229): View more from Georgia

  this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.

  (1-229): View more from Georgia

  You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?

  Fav 55 1519 4449

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (203): View more from Connecticut

  have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  omg every time its on

  Fav 25 3370 1389

  share tweet
  

• (541): View more from Oregon

  my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests

  Fav 202 82521 5191

  share tweet
  
• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (940): View more from Texas

  nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that

  Fav 22 9827 1423

  share tweet
  

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?

  Fav 25 6748 1606

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (847): View more from Illinois

  Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I get to be your mom.

  Fav 11 4056 1726

  share tweet
  

• (250): View more from British Columbia

  Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.

  Fav 3 2046 932

  share tweet
  

• (416): View more from Toronto

  We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.

  Fav 2 1480 765

  share tweet
  
• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (913): View more from Kansas

  My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?

  Fav 5 1406 703

  share tweet
  

• (206): View more from Washington

  I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.

  Fav 5 669 791

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.

  Fav 0 1021 571

  share tweet
  

• (970): View more from Colorado

  It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...

  Fav 5 475 1044

  share tweet
  

• (315): View more from New York

  she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho

  Fav 5 1004 572

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (734): View more from Michigan

  I can't adult today.

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Take a nap and try again

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.

  Fav 1 413 154

  share tweet
  

Randomize