There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
