So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Randomize
