He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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