I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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