I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
