she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
