In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
