we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
