i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
