So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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