If i come over, it means nothing
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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