i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
