Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
