The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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